Knobheads on Quiz Shows

What possessed you to apply?
Did your friends with good advice implode?
We should hang you up in chains
Let you rot beside the ill-paved road

Born too late for the First World War
Siege of Troy was long before my time
Naseby, Jutland, Agincourt
Characters perhaps from pantomime

Authors, sport, landlocked states
Capitals of Europe and their size
Breeds of dog, famous dates
Kind of hoping these things don’t arise

I don’t watch films in black and white
The trees and flowers and birds have passed me by
I’ll just guess and hope I’m right
The first man into space was Captain Bligh

Good luck back in work
They’ll’ve heard you were on
Have you got the file for Mr Out In Round One?
Harken, a cuckoo! Or is it a wren?
Don’t ever darken our doorstep again

Truth is beauty, beauty truth
All you know on earth, all you need to know
Superb, succinct
Pity then for you it’s not quite so
Hickstead, Hickstead, Hickstead, Hickstead
Duck Soup, 1933
Words beginning with K-N-O
Words that end in B-H-E-A-D

Videos

Please let me know if you see any live performance videos for this song on YouTube which haven't been listed below. Thanks!