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  1. Eric T'viking on The first man into space was Captain BlighGo »

    Don’t usually see any tea-time telly these days, but some quiz show called Chase (?) was on when I was donating blood after work last Wednesday. No sound, as the medics also had some mindless radio show on, but I could read the subtitles as I lay there, ebbing into my plastic bag.

    Quiz master: “The Vedas are part of which religion?”

    Contestant: “Er… Jedi?”

    28 September 2020

  2. transit full of keith on Fall, TheGo »

    Lisa Stansfield got off with Mark E Smith at Barry White’s 50th birthday party. True story (according to “Funky Si” Wolstonecroft).

    27 September 2020

  3. Stephen on Llewelyn-Bowen, two Carols…Go »

    I took the ‘wade in the water’ reference to be about someone (chimp, child [inner or actual], whoever’s the subject of the song) getting in the big water feature at the centre of earls court during the ideal home show.

    27 September 2020

  4. peter mcornithologist on SerpentineGo »

    Just to say thank you Dr.D. Much merriment in Hartlepool.

    27 September 2020

  5. dr desperate on SerpentineGo »

    (You know, the movie – ‘The In-Laws’.)

    27 September 2020

  6. dr desperate on SerpentineGo »

    Remember, serpentine!

    27 September 2020

  7. Vicky Esposito on SerpentineGo »

    is there a demonic snake?

    26 September 2020

  8. dr desperate on Keepers CottageGo »

    Yes, Archers; former rented home of dishy doctor Richard Locke who had an affair with Shula then departed in a huff.
    Also Emmerdale; current home of Victoria Sugden, broken into by Liv Flaherty in order to steal her dresses.
    Neither has an apostrophe.

    26 September 2020

  9. EXXO on Martin Jarvis was completing his week in Dictionary CornerGo »

    Good point. Which rather reassuringly suggests that Mr. B has never read any Helen Fielding, let alone any actual countryside romance. I wonder if the author’s name was put there as a stop-gap, pending research that was then forgotten about?

    26 September 2020

  10. Clown in a yaris on Martin Jarvis was completing his week in Dictionary CornerGo »

    Fantastic song, however.

    The Helen Fielding/Martha Flanagan/Karen Henderson section has bothered me for some time. Helen Fielding novels are predominately set in London and have very little to do with the countryside. In my view Karen Henderson would be far more likely to appear in a Helen Fielding novel than Martha Flanagan. If the lyric had been ‘Henry Fielding’ novel i would have slept better.

    Could use some help with this.

    26 September 2020

  11. EXXO on And now it’s all Eva Cassidy…Go »

    He might well indeed call it the Peak, if he wasn’t rhyming.

    Which may also explain some of his other non-Derbyshire vocabulary choices.

    25 September 2020

  12. TRANSIT FULL OF keith on And now it’s all Eva Cassidy…Go »

    Something that slightly bothers me about that line is that I think if he grew up in Eyam, he might call it the Peak, not the Peaks? Not quite sure. (I know the villages on the Manchester side of the national park have ‘in the High Peak’ on their signs, but that might be a more specific area).

    25 September 2020

  13. EXXO on And now it’s all Eva Cassidy…Go »

    Agree with the Doc, and now that he mentions it, “wander in the Peaks” is slightly better, for reasons both of geography (wander in the region, rather than wandering the mountain tops) and of making the internal rhyme even better, with the repetition of /ɪn/ (rather than /ɪŋ/ ) + “eek(s)” in four lines.

    25 September 2020

  14. dr desperate on And now it’s all Eva Cassidy…Go »

    I hear only one ‘in’, I’m afraid. (I suppose it could be “wander in the Peaks”.)

    25 September 2020

  15. transit full of keith on Pre-Gig Chat (2019/20 gigs)Go »

    Never sure if these things do any good, but with the newly announced version of the “jobs protection scheme” doing sod all for musicians, live venues, etc., it might be worth helping get this petition on the subject over 100,000 names and debated in parliament. //

    25 September 2020

  16. Webweasel on And now it’s all Eva Cassidy…Go »

    I’m pretty sure it’s “we’d go wanderin’in the Peaks”. Anyone agree?

    25 September 2020

  17. EXXO on DundalkGo »

    Good to see that Dundalk’s Cold and Hungry Army (as they would surely be known if there were any sense in this world) went through on penalties as a reward for their schlep.

    But alas Peter, there’s no passport stamp on the bus journey to Tiraspol from Chisinau. Even Putin’s Russian troops stationed there don’t see it as a separate state (though the other 3 Russian-backed breakaway republics elsewhere do). Shame for souvenir hunters, ‘cos it’s the last place in the world with the hammer and sickle on its flag and documentation, even though it’s not communist or socialist.

    As an interesting aside, 13 different nationalities played for Tiraspol in that match tonight, with 2 more nationalities on the bench. Only one player was Moldovan and none of themTransnistrians.

    I myself lost interest in the Moldovan league when the wonderfully-named FC Agro folded in 2003.

    Meanwhile I noticed there were two classic Biscuit derbies in the Europa league last week. Aberdeen won 2-0 in Stavanger, despite a couple of painful injuries, and Malmö triumphed by the same score, upsetting the ageing Armchair Honved Army.

    Actually there were arguably three Biscuit derbies that night as Bala Town (the Treweryn Army, as I’ve no doubt history will come to know them) lost by the same scoreline in front of the Mighty Beige Army‘s imposing but empty wall of beige banners in Liège.

    24 September 2020

  18. peter mcornothologist on DundalkGo »

    Dundalk F C playing in the strange land of Transnistria tonight. They must have fascinating passports,

    24 September 2020

  19. Half Matt, half Byrne on Houses of ParliamentGo »

    A semi-legendary* A-Level law trip to a conference in London, took in the public gallery of the House of Commons on the day Parliament decided to go to war with Iraq. I got to see William Hague say his piece. We then binned that off to sight see and be bought drinks by the teacher in Soho. Several of us, myself included were still 17 at that point. The teacher got in trouble with the stewardess on the train home due to our age and had to write a letter of apology a few days later. We also learnt that he drive home that night. Wonderfully ironic from the Law teacher.

    *in my particular age group and the year below, localised within an area of Plymouth.

    24 September 2020

  20. Half Matt, half Byrne on HerpesGo »

    Well, that’s proven to be a misheard lyric. I’ve been thinking it said Barry… Perkins and then I’d wonder who Barry Perkins is.

    As I’m late to the A-Z, I am of course treating myself to going sequentially in quiet moments, so this may not be the last misheard reference.

    24 September 2020

  21. Half Matt, half Byrne on Henry RollinsGo »

    As early 1980s American hardcore goes, My War is a very listenable album.

    24 September 2020

  22. cream cheese and chives on Slightly orgasmic at the thought of vampire lustGo »

    Having just seen a John Lewis advert ‘for autumn'(?) I don’t know anyone who has a life that is even remotely like that. Not quite the lockdown zeitgeist of real life but I suspect the main antagonists are partial to peaches on their cornflakes.

    24 September 2020

  23. pAUL F on That air of “look, aren’t we dangerous”Go »

    From today’s Thurston Moore webchat on the Guardian website.

    1234Ramones asks:

    Ever been to Nantwich?


    No, I’ve never been there as far as I know! Because I don’t know what the fuck it is.

    23 September 2020

  24. Bad liser on Pre-Gig Chat (2019/20 gigs)Go »

    Sports today told to anticipate no-one being allowed to attend till the end of March. 3 gigs due before then. Rock City and Durham getting postponed more than a 1970s 3rd tound FA Cup tie in all probability.

    22 September 2020

  25. dr desperate on The difference between us and all the other bands…Go »

    Anyone interested in that kind of thing could contact the producer of the programme, Roger Short, at Radio 3 and ask politely for more AK.

    22 September 2020

  26. EXXO on The difference between us and all the other bands…Go »

    Thanks so much for the heads-up John. At the risk of exposing myself even more obviously as the kind of person from whom the piss is ripped in most HMHB lyrics, those were the recordings that inspired me to go on musical journeys of my own, in the days when you just looked in the paper in Harare to see where Thomas Mapfumo or Stella Chiweshe were playing. Andy never did any of that ‘cos is was trendy, he did it cos it was good and worthwhile and thereby I suppose he made it trendy. Same could be said of Eno, Gabriel, etc. All ahead of the game.

    22 September 2020

  27. dr desperate on The difference between us and all the other bands…Go »

    I can’t think of any link to HMHB except that we met him at the Holmfirth gig last year, but on Sunday night there was a triumphant, though brief, return to BBC R3, playing music he recorded around the world from 1986 to ’91 on his Sony Walkman Pro (“the AK47 of cassette recorders”) by Andy Kershaw (the AK47 of radio presenters).
    It’s available for over a year, with another instalment next Sunday.

    22 September 2020

  28. EXXO on She’s on the Isle of ThanetGo »

    I’d probably give a similar response to the one we had earlier this year in the HMHB in the media thread (posts 277-282). The fourteener rhythm is a common one (as you say, Ian Dury, Squeeze, Supersonic) so using it doesn’t make it a specific parody of anyone or nod to anyone. If Blackwell wanted to parody anyone specific he’d probably tell us.

    It seems to me that the lyricist Mr. B parodies most often when he goes on and on with repeated rhymes and spoof bad rhymes (from Reflections in a Flat through to Left Lyrics in the Practice Room, to name just two examples) is himself, and there’s certainly an element of that in this song too, especially with the A-Z line.

    22 September 2020

  29. paul f on More HMHB in the MediaGo »

    Closer than Johnnie Walker’s “Half Moon Half Biscuit” Dr D.

    22 September 2020

  30. Pirx the purist on I think I’m right in saying I applaudedGo »

    I thought that I’d posted about this, but anyway…

    There was (probably still is) a woman called Pia Zadora, who was/is an actress, model & singer who was spectacularly mediocre at all three.

    Someone had the bright idea of casting her in the lead rôle in a Broadway production of ‘The Diary Of Anne Frank’.

    Come the opening night, her performance was so execrable that when the Nazi soldiers stormed onto the stage looking for Anne, the whole audience was said to have cried out in unison, “She’s in the attic!”

    21 September 2020

  31. Webweasel on She’s on the Isle of ThanetGo »

    I can see the nod to Ian Dury and Squeeze but does anyone else think it’s a bit of a joke at Oasis’s expense (specifically their ‘rhyming dictionary’ songs like Supersonic).

    Also, Acidic Regulator… like Bisodol?

    21 September 2020

  32. HENDRIX tattoo on More HMHB in the MediaGo »

    I’ll give that a listen later John. To see if my suggestion of ‘Corned Beef’ by Blondie was mentioned….

    21 September 2020

  33. dr desperate on More HMHB in the MediaGo »

    HMHB mentioned by Tom Robinson on tonight’s R6M ‘Now Playing’ programme about misheard lyrics and misremembered band names (at the opposite end of the show to my own suggestion of Hendrix’s “Kiss this guy” line, as it happens): misprinted on a 1990 Reading Festival poster as ‘Half Man Half Bisuit’.
    That’s not how I would spell, etc.

    20 September 2020

  34. EXXO on Mine’s a pint of Badger’s Entirely BlamelessGo »

    I’m not sure it’s ever been pointed out that Peter Brine was born exactly 10 years to the day before Mr. B.

    20 September 2020

  35. KIP KEINO on Mine’s a pint of Badger’s Entirely BlamelessGo »

    Two years on, I’ve just realised that the brine that Stuart Boam is swimming in is the reluctant audience member’s tears of boredom. Better late than never.

    20 September 2020

  36. Brumbiscuit on More HMHB in the MediaGo »

    BBC Breakfast this morning. Short piece about a new Birkenhead venue. Mentioned every band except our four lads who shake The Wirral.

    19 September 2020

  37. EXXO on More HMHB in the MediaGo »

    Don’t think anyone’s given us a heads-up on this interview 2 years ago with the great Steve Hardstaff.
    0:58 – 1.06 in particular talks about his friendship with Mr. B, influence on the songs, the covers of Voyage, TLP and the spoof covers. Just after that (1.07-1.11) is the answer to what I’ve always wondered about how he got the trade name Jacuzzi.

    19 September 2020

  38. Intheshadowoflilly on Late Lunch audience, we’ve got all your addresses!Go »

    Only one place they ended up unfortunately.

    18 September 2020

  39. nige on Let me hear you say hosepipe banGo »

    There’s a new you tube video today from around Entwistle and the guy wanders around the Wayoh reservoir (Geoff Marshall)

    17 September 2020

  40. dr desperate on Let me hear you say hosepipe banGo »

    As here.

    16 September 2020

  41. Flintlock on Late Lunch audience, we’ve got all your addresses!Go »

    Going all floppy will get you labelled as a “flipping nuisance” by the deputy commissioner of the Metropolitan Police:

    16 September 2020

  42. EXXO on Let me hear you say hosepipe banGo »

    Just seen Cygnus’ July 2018 comment for the first time, don’t know why I missed it till now, but would like to nominate him for a Silver Biscuit. If I did make the connection when the album first came out, I certainly can’t remember it now. Obviously we knew that Mr. B’s quip was referencing the Outhere brotehrs massive 1994 hit: Boom boom boom let me hear you say wayo, wayo. But we didn’t make the Wayoh connection.

    The reporting crews and press photographers always have favourite spots where they can get easy shots of cracked mud reservoir beds, and Wayoh will be one of them for the NW lot, as you can get shots from the quiet road along the dam while looking north towards a spectacular viaduct.

    16 September 2020

  43. EXXO on Let me hear you say hosepipe banGo »

    The ‘charlie in Bali’ archetype of the rock star who is being lampooned isn’t that clever though. He would surely be far more likely to be impressed by the oneness at some event in Stromness (low-key warm up gig? out-of-the-way venue?) rather than the wanness. He’s more lad rock than shoegazing also-ran. It’s a clever song in the voice of an unclever character, like a number of others.

    16 September 2020

  44. GeordiePaul on Let me hear you say hosepipe banGo »

    I just used the word Wanness in a scrabble type game and wanted to send the quote to my opponent from this song so I came here and was alarmed to see the word oneness in its place.
    Come on now. Wanness is so much more clever and just the sort of wonderful word play that Nigel delights in.

    16 September 2020

  45. Alice Van Der Meer on The Peak Cavern, (Devil’s Arse Cave), Hope Valley gig – 16th August 2019Go »

    You use that word a lot. I do not think it means what you think it means.

    (I’ll get me coat, OK?)

    16 September 2020

  46. dr desperate on The Peak Cavern, (Devil’s Arse Cave), Hope Valley gig – 16th August 2019Go »


    16 September 2020

  47. EXXO on The Peak Cavern, (Devil’s Arse Cave), Hope Valley gig – 16th August 2019Go »

    I took your word for it on the Google maps error there, cos for example their app used to bring hapless drunken students tumbling through my back gate as if it were part of a public footpath. But as I happened to be using G Maps just now I thought I’d have a look, and it doesn’t show that at all. Like any map it does show the nearest point in the Secret Valley to the entrance to the cavern (in the other gorge), may be only about only 150m horizontally, but this is through a vertiginous limestone ridge (which without contour lines, you need to go onto the satellite to see), and it would take a twenty-minute walk to get from one point to the other without ropes.

    16 September 2020

  48. transit full of keith on Trying in vain to wave a fourball throughGo »

    Best resemblance I could find was a speeded up and heavily disguised riff from Mother-Sister! but I think your Elastic Man is closer to the mark (changed a bit, not a straight lift). But I’ve just noticed Dr D’s comment above (#49) and that is an uncanny resemblance

    15 September 2020

  49. John anderson on Trying in vain to wave a fourball throughGo »

    To me it sounds a bit like a speeded up version of the intro to How I Wrote Elastic Man.

    15 September 2020

  50. transit full of keith on Trying in vain to wave a fourball throughGo »

    I think you’re right Pirx – very familiar and early Fall-ish, but I can’t think which song, a good excuse to dig out Witch Trials, Dragnet etc this evening to try to pinpoint it (my poor family).

    15 September 2020