Well, the challenge was to come up with a draw mechanism which was even more complex than the last round, and it was agreed to go with this, based on the results of the hare running at Monmore on 27th November. What we learned was that greyhound results are a bit chaotic, but the eventual draw was as follows:
| The Light at the End of the Tunnel | v | The Trumpton Riots |
| Twenty Four Hour Garage People | v | Bob Wilson – Anchorman |
| Evening of Swing (Has Been Cancelled) | v | National Shite Day |
| Everything’s AOR | v | For What Is Chatteris… |
Need reminding why any of these songs are so great? Try here:
Comments now closed. See the results – and comment on them – here.
Stringy bob
Well that sounds absolutely barking mad. So I’m all for it.
And yes, that was intended.
24 November 2015
Two fat feet
Well you lost me at Monmore, but it’s probably still less complicated than that thing that used to be the European Cup.
24 November 2015
EXXO
Seems like the obvious way to do it.
24 November 2015
Dickhead in quicksand
What’s fairness got to do with it?
Of course I approve!
24 November 2015
Jeff Dreadnought
Oh no, not the old “base the draw on an arcane formula derived from the order in which the six dogs in each race of the Monmore meeting finish” chestnut again. Couldn’t you have come up with something more original?
24 November 2015
Dickhead in quicksand
More evidence that this site is either the dogs or going to them.
24 November 2015
Jeff Dreadnought
I just think the whole Monmore idea is a bit Hackneyed.
24 November 2015
talking to plankton
Wonderful. Brilliantly barking.
24 November 2015
gipton teenager
Nice to see some original thought from CtSO, rather than doggedly following tradition.
24 November 2015
Bobby SVARC
It’s Woking really well.
24 November 2015
Jeff Dreadnought
We’ll be tearing our hare out trying to keep up.
24 November 2015
EXXO
Well the Rovers have totally gone to the dogs so why not the LFC?
I’m glad to see that 3 of the dodgiest dogs in the Black country won’t have any influence on fate’s fickle tombola: gnarled old Nidge ‘The Fridge’ is slated to go in race 11, Victor ‘the Loser’ Vaporub in race 10 and old Blind Cindy (named after one of the Blue Peter guide dogs of course) in race 9.
24 November 2015
Chris The Siteowner
I think we’ll be doing it on Friday if they have their meeting then, as I’m out on Thursday night.
24 November 2015
peter mcornithologist
Brilliant idea.This format should winalot of chums.
24 November 2015
as told to a. boyle
I’ll keep my trap shut on this one.
24 November 2015
SIMON P
That idea is truly the dog’s bollocks.
24 November 2015
Nagasaki shinpads
I think we will all need the Hare of the Dog after co-ordinating that strategy…
25 November 2015
Nagasaki shinpads
…and what if the one called Sheba dies?
25 November 2015
Jeff Dreadnought
Chris, all things considered, I think you need to come up with a fairer system.
This one sounds like wuff justice.
25 November 2015
Brumbsicuit
Much as I like the concept, it needs work to whippet into shape.
25 November 2015
Jeff dreadnought
@Brumbiscuit Yes, but you have to admit it has BAGS of potential.
25 November 2015
Sera69
Well, it’s fairer than a FIFA World Cup decision. . .
25 November 2015
toastkid
Brilliant idea.
25 November 2015
Bobby SVARC
I think it’s a load of bunny
25 November 2015
Half man half bike kit
Logical and elegant in its simplicity.
25 November 2015
Two fat feet
It certainly makes Alan Partridge’s World Cup Wheel look distinctly amateurish.
25 November 2015
paul f
As the guardian of the retired greyhound Norths Carousel (7 wins in 75 races), I am unfeasibly excited at the idea.
25 November 2015
Chris The Siteowner
The draw will commence at 2:18pm on Friday 27th November and should drag on for over two hours, a bit like the World Cup draw but with less criminal involvement.
(TFF: Brilliant. Does anyone want to come up with some contrived online version of the World Cup Wheel for the semi final draw?)
25 November 2015
EXXO
I look forward to retrospectively scanning the dozens of live updates when I get back from fishing on Friday. Not been on the river for nearly 6 weeks now so not even this unique light entertainment format will stop me.
25 November 2015
Stringy BOB
Just a thought … If after a couple of ties are done and you come up with a division that leaves the remainder of (say) 9 then will the highest numbered song left be assigned that slot in the draw?
25 November 2015
Schoon
If you are dividing by 8, 7 and so on, you can’t have a remainder of 9.
If you divide by 8, max remainder has to be 7.
Very clever by CtSO.
25 November 2015
Stringy BOB
OK but not so clever if there are four ties left and the songs are 1234 and the remainder is 5? Or is this kind of thing not possible?
25 November 2015
Schoon
No, four left would be 0 through 3. Divide the 263415 by 4 and get a remainder between 0 and 3. CtSO is an evil genius.
25 November 2015
EXXO
At the risk of sounding even more like the chartist-bludgeoning Charles Exford of ‘Letters Sent’, I would like to propose exams in basic arithmetic (as well as a lyrics references quiz on all songs), as pre-conditions of earning the vote in future editions of the Lux Familiar Cup.
25 November 2015
Dickhead in quicksand
For the semifinal draw routine – anyone got an octopus, or are they only good for predicting results?
There are seven jump races at Uttoxeter on 8 December (third race at one twenty, expect to be down by one thirty-five). By my calculation, that could be just after or just before the quarterfinals are all resolved, and some sort of placepot bet might be in order…
25 November 2015
Batley’s very own… Steve malkmus
Will a squid do?
26 November 2015
Stringy BOB
Exxo, your idea of basic arithmetic is very different to mine
26 November 2015
Dickhead in quicksand
@BVO…SM
Six might.
26 November 2015
Martin
Recalling Partridge on TDT, I am slightly concerned that bad weather might intervene and force a postponement of the draw. We do live in Britain after all. And it has happened before (see 2010 link below). Less concerned about waiting a day or two longer; more concerned about someone telling me I will have to enjoy Strictly Come Dancing. All will be well if we ditch the opinionated weather forecasters and ensure we have received the long-range from the Met.
http://callsopp4racing.blogspot.co.uk/2010/12/monmore-off.html
26 November 2015
Jarg Alan
Greyhound racing is cruel to the dogs. Please don’t do anything to encourage it or make it seem OK. Thanks.
26 November 2015
Dr Desperate
I had a glass of water (couldn’t source Sass in the time available) with Paolo Hewitt last week, and told him about his appearance in MHR. He denied any knowledge of it, or of Monmore (though he admitted he’d heard of dog-racing).
26 November 2015
THE REFEREE WITH A GUN
I have been sitting silently on the sidelines too long.
I would just like to say how much I am enjoying this whole site and especially the fierce banter that this round of the Lux has created..
Plenty of recent business travel has enabled me to have the whole playlist on shuffle and allowing me to enjoy HMHB even more than before.
The quarters draw was such an obvious plan there should be no need for debate.
Keep up the good work.
26 November 2015
Kendo nagasaki
Far too many dog puns. I feel your suggested plan is too formulaic. Why not something a little leftfield like pulling balls with numbers on out of a see through plastic bowl? Alas I fear I may be hounded out of town for such free thinking
26 November 2015
Two fat feet
Nah, seen ’em try that on the telly a couple of times. It’ll never catch on.
26 November 2015
Nagasaki shinpads
For the semi-final draw what about randomly picking 4 items available at B&Q…like a drain cover….grey emulsion… lawn feed and a set of bathroom taps…then find which aisle they are in, note the numbers…then highest v lowest and the 2 middle numbers together.
27 November 2015
EXXO
Do you want the good news or the bad news?
Well they are both the same bit of news anyway, since hell is other people’s marmite and all that.
As you can see, I’m not fishing today (been, yesterday) and not only I am free to go to the dogs with you, but I’ve got a really tedious job application to do, with like about 38 sections, so I’m free to do the variant analysis on the draw … if nobody bricks me up in the meantime.
27 November 2015
EXXO
So, I’m sure like all of you I’m having a practice run here, race one at 2.18 looks nailed on to be 216534 and race two at 2.37 should finish 325164, wouldn’t you say?
This would give us 6 v. 0 or EoS v. 24HGP if I’ve read it correctly…
Ladies and gentlemen, Monmore. Race One. The dogs are parading …
27 November 2015
Nagasaki shinpads
How soft is the track Exxo?
27 November 2015
EXXO
Medium rare.
trap 1 here Gortnaskeha Gale should appreciate the tail wind.
more than can be said for trap 6, who sounds a bit like Blackwell something.
Monmore …. hare’s running!
27 November 2015
EXXO
Technical problems in the trackside studio here; monitors went down. Nobody at HQ to fill?
27 November 2015
EXXO
“Race Void” … WTF ??
ah well, about to go in the traps here for race 2 …. which we now assume is race 1 for draw purposes?
27 November 2015
Chris The Siteowner
I’m just refreshing the page on the Sporting Life and Racing Post sites until the results appear. And yes, I guess race 2 is now race 1. I think the track was invaded by disgruntled R&RIFOBW fans.
27 November 2015
EXXO
Very open race this one looks …. but money talking for traps 2 & 6
Monmore, hare’s running (really this time)
27 November 2015
EXXO
4-2-5-??? 6 never featured despite the late money.
27 November 2015
Chris The Siteowner
5-1-3-4-6-2.
27 November 2015
EXXO
5-1-3-4-6-2 official result – jees the commentator there had more of a mare than number 6 did
27 November 2015
EXXO
The Christening Party Arsehole gets the home tie that opponents will fear.
Ezekiel, Dan Brown, the Behemoth, the charmless associates all await as the dogs come out the kennels for race thr…. errm two.
27 November 2015
Bobby SVARC
Race 3 Wishbone Wizard T1, Watching on BET365
27 November 2015
EXXO
No, apologies to the commentator, it was the results fella who had the nightmare…
4-2-5-1-3-6 it was and song zero – 24HGP the selection as a result …. tricky late-night tie down the Shell garage on Borough Road ,,, they’ll be forming an orderly queue at the errrm .. the metal device tray window thingy for this one…
27 November 2015
EXXO
Peggy – trap 6 is the CBR here – f/c with trap 5
Monmore …. hares running!
27 November 2015
Chris The Siteowner
This is going to be harder than I thought!
27 November 2015
EXXO
looked like 2-1-3/5- 6-4, think 3 beat 5 ….
27 November 2015
Chris The Siteowner
213645 …so Evening of Swing gets in the first tie after all.
27 November 2015
EXXO
Know what – I don’t think we can trust the initial showings of the minor placings after 1, 2 & 3 … think we might have to wait for confirmation
27 November 2015
EXXO
yep, they don’t order the final 3 on most results sites, they are just the other dogs
27 November 2015
EXXO
Yep, forget sportinglife.com and go to racing post – takes about 15 mins for full result
213564 gives us SONG ONE !!
27 November 2015
EXXO
24HGP v Trumpton
the away side will be out to avenge their wobbly-based mates from 1985
27 November 2015
Chris The Siteowner
Er, no, because the 2:37 wasn’t what we thought, if you go by the Racing Post…
27 November 2015
Bobby SVARC
123564 I Think
27 November 2015
EXXO
oh dear oh dear, I think they call this teething troubles …. we weren’t looking at the final official result for the first race either !!!
Now showing official result as 4-2-5-3-6-1 …. so would you believe it also SONG ONE …….. the light at the end of the tunnel plays trumpton !!
27 November 2015
Stringy bob
This worse than watching ITV coverage of any sporting event, ever.
I’ll just wait til I am told who drew who I think!
27 November 2015
Jeff Dreadnought
This is even more entertaining than I’d hoped. It’s like the 1982 World Cup draw all over again.
27 November 2015
Bobby SVARC
Race 4, 3.17 Was 123564
27 November 2015
EXXO
Race Four .. I mean race three … Monmore .. the hare is ….was running while us lot were faffing about the earlier results ( no wonder the geegees have at least 30 mins gap between races …. except the last race on a Friday at Dundalk for some reason)
27 November 2015
EXXO
Gives us song zero… 24HGP …. (expert anal chap repeats earlier spiel about orderly queue at metal tray device thingy blablabla and hopes the viewer is lulled into acquiescent torpor)
27 November 2015
Chris The Siteowner
I’m waiting for the Racing Post to publish the complete times before I put anything on the spreadsheet. While that happens, what a good idea, let’s all watch the 1982 World Cup draw.
27 November 2015
Stringy bob
So to recap …
TLATEOTT v Trumpton
24HGP v ?
Race 1 was void
Swings evening was cancelled due to finishing order error?
Am I right so far?
27 November 2015
EXXO
We’re going on Svarc’s word for 24HGP at the mo …. but he is reputed to have a good eye for dogflesh …it’ll be official any moment..
27 November 2015
Chris The Siteowner
The spreadsheet is official. Unless it’s wrong. Everything else is informed speculation.
27 November 2015
Bobby SVARC
Mate of mine has a dog running in the 4.57 at Monmore, Rock It Edith.
27 November 2015
EXXO
Never doubt a prolific protege of big Jim Smith … nice neat division leaves zero …24HGP confirmed
27 November 2015
EXXO
bit late for the 3.38 but they’re loading ….. and here we go .. DRRRRR (bell rings)
MONMORE >>>>>>>
HARE’S RUNNING !!
27 November 2015
EXXO
5 6 4 3 1 2 unofficial
27 November 2015
EXXO
would unofficially give us 24HGP v. BWA … and Bob’s wikipedia photo was for a long time showing a garage forecourt so there ya go, omen-seekers
27 November 2015
Chris The Siteowner
It’s saying 5-6-3… here Exxo, and the previous race still not confirmed.
27 November 2015
EXXO
OK, in that case I’m confident of 563412 – still Bob Wilson – I should know better than to call the photo finishes from this angle – my dog here instinctively thought three had grabbed third place, so what do i know.
27 November 2015
EXXO
Ah yeah, misrtead that, 24HGP still unofficial. What would we do about dead heat? Just those places in numerical order?
27 November 2015
Bobby SVARC
Race 3.58 – 256134
27 November 2015
EXXO
Those 2 are now official on Sporting Life before Racing Post, LOL face.
Meanwhile totally missed race 5 – not as easy as it sounds this.
27 November 2015
GOK WAN ACOLYTE
This is starting to resemble the moments after the polls close in a General Election and other than the Mackems trying to speed count votes there is little else happening other than a lot of pointless speculation from experts. If there are greyhounds running called “Paddy Ashdown’s Hat” or “SNP Landslide” at Monmore I will consider my point proven.
27 November 2015
EXXO
So unofficially, trusting again the hawk eyes of the sharpshooting Svarcmeister, that gives us EoS at home in tie 3 …. the Christening Party Arsehole, Ezekiel, Dan Brown, the knights, the charmless associates, the Behemoth, the Rat pack … what a line up awaits someone!! Unofficially of course …
27 November 2015
EXXO
I’m on Vinnie here the 6 dog …. DRRRIIINNG
MONMORE >>>>
HARE’S RUNNING !!
27 November 2015
Bobby SVARC
Race 5 result 512634
27 November 2015
EXXO
very unofficial this …. but 5 1 2 6 4 2 might just give us ANOTHER fairly straighforward draw for the Fenland giant.
27 November 2015
EXXO
except that would mean there were 2 number twos… I’ll go with him again
27 November 2015
Bobby SVARC
Interesting Exxo, 2 trap 2’s
27 November 2015
EXXO
ZERO !! unofficially EoS v NSD
27 November 2015
paul f
Thank Christ for that – I’d have feared for your sanity if EoS had drawn FWIC, Exxo!
27 November 2015
EXXO
Blimey, Ambleside will be buzzing tonight if this CSI derby is confirmed … we’ve got an OB crew heading up the M6 right now for reaction. Yes we could just phone or skype a few people, but we’ve got a crew here fancy a week in the lakes at reasonable rates …
27 November 2015
EXXO
I was dividing by the wrong number that time though …
27 November 2015
EXXO
MONMORE …
HARE’s RUNNING!!
Relying on you here Bobby my bet went through as a single not e/w so I couldn’t watch it.
27 November 2015
Bobby SVARC
Race 6 (4.37) Result – 435
27 November 2015
Bobby SVARC
612 I think, cut straight off
27 November 2015
GOK WAN ACOLYTE
Don’t we have the full draw now? We don’t need the dogs to determine that the last tie is Everything’s AOR v Chatteris, unless there are some who think that a home tie is important
27 November 2015
Chris The Siteowner
It’s true, but we need to make sure all the balls were in the bag, so to speak.
27 November 2015
Bobby SVARC
Right, Rock It Edith, A few quid @4/1
27 November 2015
EXXO
Little bit late again for this one…. they’re not so much parading down to the start as being dragged reluctantly through a downpour ….
27 November 2015
EXXO
the favourite’s mum didn’t like it soft I’ve heard …
27 November 2015
EXXO
Oi! Pay attention you lot!!
Course it matters who’s at home when MotR plays AoR…
27 November 2015
Bobby SVARC
Race 7 (4.57) Result – 136524
27 November 2015
EXXO
MONMORE !!!
HARE’S RUNNING ……
27 November 2015
EXXO
Hmm, think your broadband’s a tad faster than mine Svarco… away tie for the Fen Tigers it is then. Gwwaaarn Kendo lad.
27 November 2015
Bobby SVARC
BT, Shit off a shovel in Leics.
27 November 2015
Two fat feet
Tough draw for my preferred songs here, only expecting to get one of my votes through … but then I did get 7/8 through in the second round when I’d have been grateful for four.
27 November 2015
Chris The Siteowner
Based solely on the songs’ performances in the Baguette Dilemma Round, I would imagine three of these ties will be very close. And even the odds-on favourite for the tournament, the song which won the Baguette Dilemma Round by a street, has not got it as easy as it might have done.
27 November 2015
Batley’s very own… Steve malkmus
If that chart at the top of the page is official, then the local derby in game 3 is likely to be moved to midday on a Sunday to suit the TV coverage…
27 November 2015
Chris The Siteowner
Nope, we move ties for nobody in this tournament. Saturday to Tuesday teatime they remain. There’ll be no fans’ boycott here.
27 November 2015
BrumbiscUit
The two lighter-hearted songs meet in this round, I see. I think this may be when Bob gets his comeuppance. At least one of them is through to the semis though.
27 November 2015
SIMON P
At last, Chatteris gets a tough draw. That’ll be close. Trumpton and NSD are big favourites for their ties. 24HGP is the narrow favourite for the other.
27 November 2015
Jeff Dreadnought
Based on what I now think happened in the BD round, it looks like a last four of Light, Shite, AOR and – by the width of a Kit-Kat wrapper – 24 GHP.
I wonder who Chris means by the odds-on favourite, though? Light or Shite?
27 November 2015
peter mcornithologist
So it is cheerio to either Mr.Ed or Ezekiel. Feckin useless whippets.
27 November 2015
Stringy bob
My money would be on 4 away wins. Maybe 24HGP could see off Bob. I think Chatteris and Shite will both go through with a comfortable 65/35 margin.
I’d prefer 4 aways to 4 homes to be honest, even if that does put Chatteris through.
27 November 2015
Chris The Siteowner
Jeff – that would be telling, but I’m surprised at how little comment there’s been about the seriously large gap (4.8%!) at the top of the Baguette Dilemma Round table, especially as the subsequent knockout matches have tended to mirror the placings in the qualifiers.
Some interesting ties. The first features the two beaten semi-finalists from 2011. Boom! Then, as Brumbiscuit observes, the two lighter-hearted songs still in the tournament, so it won’t be those-who-like-the-funny-songs against those-who-prefer-the-deeper-or-noisier-ones. In the third tie, the opening and closing songs from the only album with two songs left, so it won’t be those-who-like-the-newer-songs against those-who-prefer-the-older-ones. And in the final tie, what looks like the form song (one massive win, then the scalp of the no.2 from the Baguette Dilemma Round) against the beaten finalist (and highest remaining song) from last time. Boom!
My preference would be two homes, an away and a don’t care. Not in that order, necessarily. But my taste doesn’t appear to reflect the mainstream, most of my favourites went out long ago. My prediction is that there’ll be two homes and two aways, with two matches not going the way the Baguette Dilemma Round would suggest. But I was well off with my forecast in the last round.
27 November 2015
Brumbiscuit
Much as I love 24HGP, Bob’ll get my vote. It is the almost perfect HMHB take on a pop song. I can only place it in that category with the very under-rated 27 Yards of Dental Floss.
Once in the semis, who knows how either of them would perform? Maybe a ’73 Sunderland-esque giant killing in the final, even? I suppose that would all depend on the opposition…
27 November 2015
Two fat feet
Setting out my stall for the quarters.
Voting for Light but Trumpton to win with 56%.
Voting for 24 but Bob to win with 51%.
Reluctantly going against the Swing, but NSD is a formidable proposition. Shite to win with 66% of votes, mine included.
Voting for Chatteris but AOR to win with 58%.
Hearts are going to be broken at every turn from hereon in.
27 November 2015
Beltane beard
Light, Bob and Shite are easy choices for me but no idea how I am going to overcome the huge dilemma of AOR v Chatteris. That is such a cruel tie.
27 November 2015
Stringy BOB
This draw has made it much easier to make decisions. Trumpton, Bob, Shite and AOR for me.
28 November 2015
gipton teenager
The hardest one for me is EOS v. NSD, but I remember a post on one of the threads (sorry, can’t remember who it was) saying that NSD is the story of their life. I agree with this sentiment but for me it’s my constant internal monologue (which occasionally becomes external). The problem is can one raise the cup on National Shite Day?
28 November 2015
Hazelsound
Thanks to CtSO for taking my mind off a terrible week at work. Monmore was a moment of genius and I loved the schoolgirl maths involved. Any anxiety I might have felt about the pending draws was diminished in the face of greyhound mayhem. What will be will be.
28 November 2015
Kendo nagasaki
National shite day must go into these quarter finals as overwhelming favourite
29 November 2015
nigeyb
Tougher than tough however for me home advantage prevailed every time – all the songs listed first got my vote. Lots of disappointed away fans licking their wounds on their long journeys home
2 December 2015
ALAN Alan Sunderland
4 away wins for me.
2 December 2015
mr Ed
It was a mathematically safe prediction that the round with 3 contenders would produce a result 0. It was 50:50 whether the round with 6 contenders would produce 3 or 0. Try a few variations if you don’t believe me. I leave the proof of this to the interested reader.
5 December 2015