National Shite Day
vs.
Everything’s AOR
Here’s our Super Sunday match alright. Although many people might (correctly) have predicted these two songs would end up in the top ten of the qualifying stages, perhaps few would have guessed they’d be nine places apart. This one could be an epic.
Result
National Shite Day 142
vs.
Everything’s AOR 104
Brian Duffin
Easy. No contest.
Pretending to be Kendo Nagasaki with a tennis racquet wins the tie hands down for me.
8 May 2011
TWO FAT FEET
A year or two ago I would have gone with AOR but National Shite Day has trampled all over my brain ever since I paid more attention to the two most recent albums after a generally fallow period Biscuit-wise.
MT&D is possibly the most (pause) song-based album and is possibly their most commercial-sounding. AOR is definitely the best track and it has just cause to be a live staple, although I was a bit surprised to find it closing the last two gigs. However Shite Day is a blast from start to finish and could possibly be Nigel’s finest vocal performance.
8 May 2011
littlegrafter
pass
too hard for a Sunday night
8 May 2011
Kingsbeef
The one I’ve been dreading because I love the chunky ones. But It’s too hard. AOR is better live but Shite Day is just brilliant and has that great manky riff and Stringy Bob. I’ve never overplayed a song as much when I first heard it. Aaaaargh! I’m going to have to sleep on it.
8 May 2011
Poolio
AOR… opened a peculiar chapter in my life… a friend sent a letter to Kendo, stating what a great fan I was, he got in touch, sent a signed poster and offered to visit… I declined. Never held a tennis raquet since! But a belting tune… not a fan of talky bits, but as a fast urban walker, the bit about embracing the marings is one of my fave commens… sadly not enough to win me over…
8 May 2011
Peter Gandy
As much as I love Shite day, I had to go for AOR: fantastic arrangement with kick arse drum fills and the twiddly harmonics in the Mary, Mary section. Nagasaki line too.
8 May 2011
Bobby String
Well, with a psuedonym like mine there was only one choice really! The bit about sending a dead Sanderling to Phil Cool is the mutt’s nuts and even the opening line with the ice axe and the remaining eye is pure genius IMHO. Also, ‘shite’ is one of my favourite words. 😆
Ô¿Ô
8 May 2011
Martin
Shite Day all the way. No brainer here.
8 May 2011
Third Rate Les
0 mins: Teams are lining up. Looks like a bruising encounter, this one. Crowd in a buoyant mood, although one lot of them will be booking their flights home at the end.
3 mins: GOAL! AOR steals an early lead with an unstoppable chunky bass opening, jangly guitar overlay and opening words “bubble perm”.
4 mins: GOAL! Oh my word. National Shite Day scores straight from the restart with a neat bit of noisy guitar work and then some jaw-dropping bit of ice axe-related lyrics. Many in the stands have hardly taken their seats and it’s 1-1
15 mins: PENALTY! National Shite Day’s burly midfielder Stockard Channing makes an appeal for the fat kids in sausage rolls
15 mins: GOAL! the Man With The Mullet (well, one of them) emphatically smashes the ball into the roof of the net. 2-1 to the Shite.
26 mins: GOAL! The sheer exuberance of AOL’s big Kendo Nagasaki chorus is too much for the Shite and it’s even again.
45 (+1): GOAL! The Shite get their noses in front again; the black and white rainbow gets the guitars all revved up for the big chorus, and it’s 3-2.
Half time: Phew, what a half of football. The pundits in the studio wonder whether AOL can get back into this, as the Shite have a few more tricks to play. They’re kicking off now. AOL remain unchanged, while the Shite have brought on tricky midfilder Stringy Bob.
67 mins: GOAL! AOR are right back in it, with an irresistible build-up of rhymes (executive/upset you with) and a litany of AOR acts building up to that killer chorus again. It’s anybody’s now.
90 mins + 3: PENALTY! AOR players are furious as the Shite are awarded a spot kick right at the death for the Sanderling episode. Play is suspended as the referee waves them away.
90 mins + 3: GOAL! It’s mayhem in the Shite stands as the blinding build-up to the final chorus, the drum roll, the lack of bog roll leave the keeper with no chance.
FINAL WHISTLE: It’s the Shite who go through, with the thrilling din of the final guitar stuff. AOR’s players have surrounded the referee and are having to be pulled away by the staff.
Phew.
8 May 2011
TWO FAT FEET
What a unique band this is. As fascinated as I would be to see it, I somehow I can’t imagine fans of, say, R. E. M. doing something like this.
8 May 2011
2 chevrons
Men with mullets will go mad with mallets in Millets if Shite Day doesn’t get through.
8 May 2011
lal
everythings a.o.r wins comfortably for me,just feel that shite day goes on far too long however the lines about that fat kids with sausage rolls and primark fm are class.tough choosing like this but 3-1 comfy win a.o.r 😉
8 May 2011
Jon
Easy one this – AOR for me. As good as Shite Day is the tune and the Nagasaki line in AOR make it nigh on unbeatable 😉
8 May 2011
an idle layabout
I’m concerned that National Shite Day and A Country Practice will split the Long Winded Rant vote and I think Shite day is Country Practice’s lesser cousin…
Sorry, but I’m glad National Shite Day is drawm against a big hitter. I just hope AOR kicks it’s bottom…
8 May 2011
dagenham dave
now this is going to take a lot of thinking about…….
8 May 2011
dagenham dave
I agree with Layabout however that ‘Shite Day’ is nowhere near the standard of ‘Country Practice’.
8 May 2011
Dave
Nostalgia means i’m going for everything and s***e is one of my least favourite, day is a good song especially the mullet line
8 May 2011
choppyc
Tough call, but AOR my favourite track of my intro album into the world of HMHB, so it gets the nod …just
8 May 2011
Neil G
National Shite Day wins by some margin. The meaty guitar riff, the brilliant lyric, the discordant chorus, Stringy Bob, no bog roll. The list goes on and on. It is definitely a close relation of A Country Practice but that is no bad thing, as far as I’m concerned. One of my favourite tracks. Should be in the semi-finals at least.
9 May 2011
Chief Exec
It’s a good rant but my vote goes to the better song.
9 May 2011
littlegrafter
My Mam knew one of Millican and Nesbit… Still doesnt help me decide
9 May 2011
Simon Smith
The chorus to AOR is always thrilling even after twenty years (where is the anniversary triple pack complete with Enschede, Mars Ultras etc?), although the Millets line is a man still on top of his game after twenty five-ish.
I don’t subscribe to the ‘longer is better’ canard (Vatican???) and Bobby used the phrase ‘mutts nuts’. To use the vernacular; a good performance by the boy String spoilt by late dismissal and the ‘racquet of God’ from Nagasaki (K) provides a David Webb 1970 face-winner.
9 May 2011
Ray Gee
AOR for me, agree with the acclaim for Kendo Nagasaki lyric, could only be done by Half Man.
Country Practise, this has become one of my favourites, but I’m mystified that there’s not much talk about A Lilac Harry Quinn, they’re a cycle shop in the Liverpool area I phoned them up and they sent my son, another Half Man fanatic…he’s 40….I’m 62+, ….and they sent my son a headed piece on their paperwork and it just said………sturmey archer, campagnolo, sturmey archer, campagnolo, sturmey archer, campagnolo on my mind, at my request, my son is a keen cyclist.
and love the line ”makes me wanna shake hands with the whole of Finland” in Architecture, Morality, Ted And Alice, why, because I lost my cherry to a Swedish girl in Finland, so you could say, well, I do, I ….more than shook hands with the (w)hole of Finland!
another of my favourite that doesn’t get too many mentions is ‘It Makes the Room Look Bigger………
oh, I’m going on a bit…………….
ray…………in Batley.
9 May 2011
Sean Macreavy
Oh Jesus… this was a 4-all draw until 3rd rate Les came up with that inspired blow-by-blow match commentary. Cheers Les!
Plus the mallet-wielding mullet-toting Millets madmen is my favourite ever Biscuit line.
Great tie, inspired!
9 May 2011
Jeff Dreadnought
Inspired commentary from the man in the designer millinery. Shame there had to be a loser, but Stringy Bob made all the difference for me, bewildering the opposition with his trademark Sanderling Move – the modern-day equivalent of the Cruyff Turn. He’s certainly lit up the tournament, and there’ll be calls for him to start the next match.
9 May 2011
Dave Cooper
AOR was the song I could play to all the doubters that said “Oh Half Man Half Biscuit, I remember them, something about Subbutteo and Trumpton wasn’t it?”
It also lifted me out of a slough of despond back in the day.
Shame if Shite Day goes out, but that’s, err, football?
9 May 2011
Kingsbeef
After a restless night Shite day wins by a mullet.
9 May 2011
cawseetiger
Shite day as I’m at work and yes..its shite!
10 May 2011
Trumptonrioter
well after having to get off the bus early because of heavy traffic in Whitehall, fight my way through the hoards of tourists with no ‘pedestrian etiquette’, find out that they are digging more holes in the road which means having to divert on foot again, dodging fat kids with sausage rolls and people doing polls, I declared today national Shite day with a capital S. So thats where my votes going.
10 May 2011
Jeremy
Difficult choice but Everything’s AOR has the best chorus ever. Period. Full stop. Whatever!!
12 May 2011
bomaya
AOR was my favourite song for many many years but the quality of the albums over the last 10 years has been immense. Mallets. Millets. Mullets. Has to be NSD.
12 May 2011
littlegrafter
Right! I’ve put this off for long enough and have now had enough to drink (dont worry GMT + 3) to let my heart overule my head. It has to be…
…can I just say that there is no better sound at a biscuits gig than the bass at the start of AOR, that grumbly noise is just immense….BUT
It has to be Shite Day, Sorry AOR, I really am, but the younger model has carried me away. I just hope its not down to one vote, I suspect it will be close though
13 May 2011