UPDATE: Voting is now closed. Result here.
A Country Practice (1998)
vs.
For What Is Chatteris… (2005)
And so we face the final curtain. It would be unfair of me to write anything here other than to list the facts, and put in videos of both songs.
A Country Practice won its group stage by a country mile, and had the 6th best performance of any song while doing so, with 57% of the voters for Four Lads giving it their vote of approval. It then went on a progressively more difficult route to the final, beating Irk The Purists, Tending The Wrong Grave, Them’s The Vagaries and The Trumpton Riots.
For What Is Chatteris… also won its qualifying group comfortably, despite Achtung Bono being the only album to get four songs into the last 32, and therefore staking a claim to being the strongest album of all. With 63% of the voters of that album supporting it, the song was the 2nd best performer in the whole of the group stages. It then had a consistently tough path to the final, beating 24-Hour Garage People, National Shite Day, Evening of Swing and The Light at the End of the Tunnel.
If you need reminding of the songs, the videos are below. If you’d like to immerse yourselves in the lyrical joy of either, click on the song titles above, and the “comments and corrections” links on those pages to read the long discussions we had about the songs while nailing the lyrics.
UPDATE: Voting is now closed. Result here.
Chris Warwick
God I love this band:-) See you all next Friday 17th, I’m the old grey git going mental at the front:-))))
11 June 2011
BIG CON
The Lux Familiar Cup has been brilliant all the way through to this Final.
It’s almost reached the point where it doesn’t matter which team wins.
Some people have been taking it very seriously and will vote devoutly for their favourite here but will they ignore the other song next Friday? I doubt it because 99% of these songs are really top class clever songs.
I’m voting Chatteris here but only because ACP is too hard to listen to.
We couldn’t get a non HMHB fan to listen to that a couple of times and say they loved it whereas you can listen to Chatteris several times over and still be smiling.
Can’t wait for Shepherd’s Bush Empire next week.
11 June 2011
aiwacat
Has to be ACP for me. I can’t vote for Chatteris as my favourite song of the entire canon, when it’s only my seventh favourite on Achtung Bono.
11 June 2011
Charles Exford
I think Con’s penultimate sentence, with its spokesmanlike ‘we’ and ‘you’, sums up the reasons I have been shuddering ever since Gregg_Z first had this idea.
11 June 2011
MISTER TUBBS
Has to be A Country Practise, such a passionate song, with all the live add ons, e.g. bitter ex-soap star, Ross kemp in the Cotswolds, and the antics of Henri Laconte. Chatteris is Ok, but its’ success here, seems a bit like John Sargeant on Come Dancing. I’ll be watching the final down the Queens’ Arse & Firkin.
11 June 2011
Dagenham dave
A Country Practice by a country mile, the best HMHB songs are those with a bit of anger in them, Chatteris is far too twee for these ears.
11 June 2011
Neil G
A Country Practice has venom. It’s not just a funny song. Chatteris is just a funny song. ACP wins in the first quarter of an hour with five easy goals. No way back for Chatteris.
11 June 2011
Lollipop Man Darren
I am rooting for Chatteris. It’s perfectly formed, sweet and to the point.
ACP is good and, like the Chatteris Town Hall Band CD, its a grower, but it’s more of a talkie; I prefer singing. Also, Chatteris is timeless whilst some of ACP’s references have dated a little.
Excellent final though, with two quality songs. I presume we will have some “Commodores” turn up for the match, carrying their sugar lumps……..
11 June 2011
Vendor of Quack Nostrums
Grumpily accepting that this is a worthy pair of finalists and that a first past the post voting system is probably the most sensible one to use in a Biccie based democracy, I am going to vote based on lyrical genius, ‘cos ultimately that is what this band is all about.
So, on the one hand:
I feel like a beggar accepting alms
Then being pelted with figs.
I felt for years that this was a rather silly, throwaway pair of lines until I started thinking about it in terms of giving something with one hand then taking it away with the other, or perhaps ‘set me up, then knock me down’ Anyway if ever anybody is re-writing the Bible with an eye on encouraging more atheist participation perhaps these two lines should be put into the story of Job to replace ‘the Lord gives, and the Lord hath taken away’.
The Centre Court amusement at the ballboy’s mishap
That bobbing up and down thing that they do at the Proms
This sums up for me everything I loathe about the British middle classes and makes me ashamed that the revolutionary fervour that I held so dear 25 years ago dwindled with the passing of time, to occasionally reappear as a slight irritability when watching the news, a hatred of all cruelty to animals and a tendency to be rude to cold callers on the telephone.
Whilst on the other:
But what’s a park if you can’t see a linnet?
A timetable if your journey’s infinite?
My bag’s packed and I’m leaving in a minute
For what is Chatteris without you in it?
Like a game-bird reserve short on pheasants
Weavers’ cottages devoid of tenants
A market town that lacks quintessence
That’s Chatteris without your presence
Surely the best bit of sustained rhyming in the whole Biscuit canon, perhaps in the history of English song-writing. ACP fans, you have 6 days to come up with better lyrical poetry than this, from any song in the English language or I’m voting for Chatteris.
11 June 2011
Kingsbeef
Thank god it’s over and we can all get back to loving the songs rather than criticising them. Because the bottom line is I can’t think of a single HMHB song that I don’t love to some degree so it’s like Sophie’s Choice in here. That said, it’s been a blast and I’ve re-evaluated a few.
Straight choice between two tracks that would’ve got nowhere near my final and despite it’s poetry Chatteris has much less to say about life than the prose of ACP. And I don’t think the references date it too badly. So for little old ladies everywhere, come on you drizzlers!
11 June 2011
Chris the Siteowner
Apart from a few “not sure how it got this far” comments, I think there’s been barely any criticising. Usually it’s been “how on earth can anyone choose between two such great songs?”
11 June 2011
Jules
A very enjoyable contest all round, watched appreciatively by a good-natured bank holiday crowd. Thanks for organising, Chris
I wonder what the band’s favourite is
11 June 2011
Jeremy
Oh dear, Oh dear, so many good songs have fallen by the by the wayside here. I truly hoped that Trumpton or Bob Wilson would get through but sadly not. I just can’t get to grips with ACP in the same way as other songs so it has to be Chatteris if only for the line about Drive by shouting.
11 June 2011
Third Rate Les
I’m quite swayed by the timetable/infinite journey line, I must admit. It’s also a song, which ACP isn’t really. However, as a moment of modern tragedy, it’s hard to imagine a better one than the old lady’s Barbican-Sting demise and the angry guitar following it.
ACP for me, and well done to Chris The Siteowner, The Stig, Sepp Blatter and the youngsters.
11 June 2011
TWO FAT FEET
It’s a fitting finale between the de facto defending champion and the one which emerged as the clear favourite following the removal of the slightly anomalous AOR. Both have had their fair share of people both championing their cause and also expressing their surprise at each song’s popularity. It’s quite possible that a large number of voters will not even have seen their personal favourite make the finals, but with such a comprehensive process, each song having to prove itself over and over again, nobody can genuinely begrudge the winning song its victory.
It’s the elegance of the rapier of Chatteris ahead of the primitive but impressively effective sledgehammer of ACP for me, but I would still have preferred to see the no-nonsense cudgel of Damnation here instead. Perhaps taking on National Shite Day with its sockful of sand.
Pity I probably won’t know the result for a week, unless tinterweb has reached Snowdonia.
11 June 2011
Third Rate Les
actually, I take that back about the “journey’s infinite” line.
It’s a good thought, but compromises the verse a bit. It’s INfinite, not inFINite.
After all, it’s Dukla Prague’s home kit that’s the really ace one but it doesn’t scan as well as the away one.
11 June 2011
Toerag
The thing is that “Chatteris” is a song and as such combines great word play and use of language with a “catchy” tune. ACP, on the other hand, has great words, but lacks a tune; therefore it has to be “Chatteris”.
God, I am starting to sound like a slightly pissed English teacher…….. and in fact…..
11 June 2011
poolio
The campaign is over and there have been some Ghana-esque performances along the way… a worthy final indeed. Hardly a pair of stags locking horns… more an embittered hyena gnawing on a baby Dalmatian… I’m going to go with….hmmmmmmmm
11 June 2011
Toerag
But then again, having watched the Youtube clips…..
11 June 2011
Elderlylady@thebustop
0-0 AET.100-100 on pens. . .It’s the old fashioned toss of the coin in the centre circle of my back yard……….
11 June 2011
Martin
Worthy final really. Innit.
11 June 2011
Vendor of Quack Nostrums
@ Third Rate Les
Linnet, infinite, minute, in it, is a perfect example of Assonance and therefore is all the better for ‘getting the rhyme wrong’ as Julie Walters once said (whilst playing Susan White in Educating Rita).
11 June 2011
Third Rate Les
It’s not assonance, it’s a rhyme. Not the same thing. All rhymes by definition have some kind of repeated vowel sound.
It’s a clever rhyme, as is the pheasants/tenants/quintessence/presence one. HMHB is riddled with similar ones though so I’m struggling a bit with the hype.
But this just shows that A-level English analysis really isn’t much use to agree what a good song is all about, so I’ll stop.
11 June 2011
Vendor of Quack Nostrums
Fair do’s. Your A level English trumps my O level English. Still think it works brilliantly as a rhyme though.
11 June 2011
Carstairs
Many thanks for the Lux Familiar Cup, Have enjoyed every vote.
11 June 2011
incrediblestringbiscuitman
Yes, give me a Lenin style General Secretary who would insist on us all standing to attention each day and singing The Trumpton Riots- lots of us do every day anyway…. Democracy’s all well and good but a bit like the completely unmemorable 2002 World Cup.
Great idea this Lux Familiar Cup. Can’t wait for the next one so I can whingealongalotagain.
And why can’t His Nigelness sing a song about Wednesbury….?
12 June 2011
Simon Smith
As ever, it’s not the two ‘Big Four’ finalists that will live on in hearts and minds as those plucky outsiders who inveigled their way into your affections. Those songs which lay between the behemoths and which engendered twitchy skip button finger.
No more shall they be >>. No more shall they be omitted from compilations for HMHB virgins. They shall be the Ronnie Radfords and Keith Houchens of the back catalogue. Wheeled out once every so often whilst Chatteris is never played again lest the honk of Stilgoe reek up the iPod.
12 June 2011
BrumBiscuit
@INCREDIBLESTRINGBISCUITMAN
Come on, matey; you’re not that far away from Bilston – and all the glory it gained last September 15th last year, are you?
Besides, give me a word that rhymes with Wednesbury? And didn’t the Undertones do Wednesbury Week all those years ago?
Still smarting from the untimely demise of National Shite Day, I shall go for ACP. I listened to many of the ranty songs on the way into Brum yesterday and Damnation still edges it for me, though ACP is a fine one.
12 June 2011
TWO FAT FEET
I don’t think the rhyme is an issue, after all I can only think of one word right now that rhymes with Chatteris and thankfully Nigel didn’t go there.
12 June 2011
Chief Exec
I’ve said all the way through it would be ACP but now I’m flip flopping.
Its an interesting matchup. A perfect 2 minutes up against 6 and a half minutes which is a rousing romp for the vast majority.
I’m a perfectionist, possibly bordering on OCD, so I’ll vote Chatteris. Although I’m unlikely to sleep until I find out what the word is that rhymes with Chatteris.
12 June 2011
Kingsbeef
Mattress, Nattrass, catless, hatless, platypus, chatter less, vat o’ cress, datalist. Oh, you mean cl…
12 June 2011
tomasz.
it’s a mystery to me how Chatteris has got this far. ACP obv.
12 June 2011
Helen
Against my prejudice I vote for a country practice. Genius
12 June 2011
steve nicholls
It’s a mystery how I got this far. But seeing as I’m here I may as well vote.
(Are you going to bring back the Watney Cup?)
12 June 2011
Sandy Coloured Clown
Chatteris – as others have said, it’s an actual song rather than (admittedly funny) prose, it’s references stand the test of time better and I marginally prefer wry sarcasm to class rants, ‘though there’s definitely a place for both.
A great competition all round (but, obviously, Bob Wilson should’ve won…) – I’ve been reading this site for a couple of years but only the Lux Familiar prompted me to get involved and fight the corner for the songs I love best.
I don’t think Chatteris is my favourite ever song, but isn’t this what the cup is about – you can get unduly partisan about your own team and unwisely believe that you can get lucky on the day, even though you know everyone else is just as passionate and romantic about their own teams, and that someone else is certainly going to win? The only difference with a genuine footie cup is that we all support lots of teams and have an opinion / interest in every round.
I take the point about it being odd to ‘rank’ Biccies songs, but it’s only a bit of fun and a prompt to re-explore some of the lesser-visited corners of our collections.
Roll on next year’s cup, and the new album.
13 June 2011
Two Fat Feet
I would say that if this is run again, it’s best to wait until the new album has been out for a bit and had time to digest, to reduce the likelihood of Chris The S’s understandable fear of the newest songs being artificially inflated simply because they’re new. If it does surface by Christmas then by all means run it again in 2013, but I think next year is too soon, whether the new album is included or not.
13 June 2011
Bobby String
This was a tough one for me too because ACP is more akin to my personal favourite, National Shite Day, in its style, content and delivery, and therefore should have been my obvious choice between these two. However, in the end I voted for Chatteris because I think it’s a great combination of very skillful lyric writing, very dry humour and a catchy little tune to boot. OK, it does have an air of Jasper Carrott about it (and the aforementioned Stilgoe) but for me, its brevity cancels that out. If it went on as long as ACP it would be intensely irritating by the end.
All that said, judging by the foregoing comments, I don’t think there’ll be much in it (rather like my bank account). For sure, like I say, at the end of the day we’ll take each Lux Familiar Cup result as it comes.
Ô¿Ô
@ CHIEFEXEC – If you watch the YouTube clip of Chatteris, some kind soul in the audience shouts it out just before the song starts. 😉
13 June 2011
Shirt Man
Chatteris is so lyrically brilliant there is only one winner for me!
13 June 2011
Kingsbeef
Two Fat Feet – I totally agree that this should be at the very least biennial event and every four years has a certain footie feel. It’s also a hell of a lot of work for an annual event. Maybe the songs could be randomly batched rather than by album and maybe I should get a job as an accountant and take up cricket like the total pedant that I can clearly see I am even as I’m typing this.
13 June 2011
TWO FAT FEET
If somebody else wants to run one as and when they feel like it then nobody is going to stop them. Otherwise we’ll let Chris decide if he could ever face running it again and when. And how. We’ve all discovered unacknowledged gems and found new personal favourites along the way, so even if it doesn’t happen again for years it will surely have rejuvenated a lot of people’s appetite for the songs for a long time to come, however long it takes the new album to appear. It certainly has mine.
13 June 2011
Kingsbeef
ditto
13 June 2011
Stephen Hope
ACP must be a pain in a**e for Neil to play – six minutes or so of that repetitive bass line. It’s a deserved finalist but Chatteris – which flies very close to Planet Twee, I admit – still does it for me.
13 June 2011
Bobby String
It would be interesting to see how it would turn out if we had only been allowed to vote for one song each from each album. Perhaps people would then put a lot more thought into which one they chose, rather than, in some cases, voting for nearly every song on the album. This would mean whatever you voted for in the group stages would have to be your absolute favourite from that particular album. Tough decision, of course, in most cases, to choose but one song from an album full of absolute stonkers, but perhaps then the final would be a more accurate reflection of what is considered THE ultimate HMHB track. However, them’s the vagaries, I suppose.
Ô¿Ô
14 June 2011
TAYLO
This is tough. Chatteris is a grower not a show-er. One you appreciate more every time you hear it and a simple beautiful love song….it also has the added appeal of being one of the songs Loop has played onstage with the biscuit, even introducing it in sheffield by playing “A Nightingale sang in Berkley Square”.
A Country Practice however is an epic….even without that relentless ever changing lyric it would be an amazing song. Unlike any other Biscuit song ACP is the one that you will always remember the first time you heard it.
For the record I believe the ultimate performance was at the Star and Garter Manchester in November 1999 when as well as appearances from Henri Leconte, Matthew Marsden, Julie Goodyear, Heather Stott, Diane Oxberry, Matthew Le Tissier and Emily Symons….he was incredibly bored with people who claimed they were incredibly bored with the word Millennium and instead, he was off to the Pier Head to ‘get bladdered’. Brilliant.
ACP wins deep in injury time for me.
14 June 2011
Dave (Or I Could Be Mike)
Hmm, 2 minutes of epic tweeness or 6 minutes of epic repetitive bass. No contest for me I’m afraid, I’m always partial to a good rhythmic bass line, and adding one of HMHB’s finest lyrics makes it ACP all the way. ‘Opinionated weathermen’ seem to be everywhere this summer…
14 June 2011
Matlock Bath
With an indoor pool and a first class cake shop, it’s Chatteris for me.
14 June 2011
OnceAMoretonian
Good luck to both songs…though how Surging Out of Convalescence didnt make it past the last 32 I will never know.
Think I will go for Chatteris, for it’s snappyiness
By the way, does anyone have an inkling of when a new album might be on its way?
14 June 2011
OnceAMoretonian
Just to be clear: I never use the worrd ‘inkling’ in my daily life…not wanting to be the target of a Nigel-rant
14 June 2011
Sean Macreavy
Oh God, I’ve agonised over this for days now, what a choice! Weirdly, neither of these are in my top ten, much as I love them both.
Great video clips, which helped me finally make up me mind… I felt a bit ground down by ACP, and a bit bored. I find myself waiting for the second half to begin. The weather forecaster/Sting stuff is wonderful, and I think that the yodelling outro may be as good a political satire as anything ever.
But I think it boils down to Chatteris being a lovable, witty ditty, self contained and perfectly crafted. Dispatched in two minutes. Boiled down, gentle genius. A final for the iconoclasts to sneak it Alan Sunderland style methinks…
14 June 2011
Vendor of Quack Nostrums
@ OnceAMoretonian
It would be a bit hypocritical of Nigel to subject you to a rant over your use of the word ‘inkling’ when he has used it himself.
It’s been like this since we saw
Prag Vec at the Melkweg.
14 June 2011
Gregg Z
Not to disparage, but I figure that the two finalists would not have finished in my top 4 songs on their respective albums.
Oh, Kip Keino…………
14 June 2011
Chippy Minton
Great effort by Chris to organise the Cup, well done.
My semi choice of Trumpton was trumped on by ACP, which I just cannot grasp so its bombs and sails all round. Light at the End or the Tunnel was beaten so I was a hopeless case.
Therefore for final I’m backing Chatteris and you can’t get a better kiss of death than that!
Neither song is my favourite as I believe many better ones have fallen by the way side.
Right I’m off to give that Mrs Honeyman a right good knobbing! Tat ta
14 June 2011
C. L. Murgatroyd
Got to be Chatteris. Frankly ACP often bores me and is skipped! Sacrilege I know!
14 June 2011
Elderlylady@thebustop
Will ACP & FWIC enter a period of coalition cup winners if they finish level on votes?
14 June 2011
Geddy Lee
Chatteris because it’s much shorter and mentioning Elton Welsby makes me ever so slightly melancholic. 17 people ‘like’ his facebook page.
14 June 2011
Trumptonrioter
i can’t sing ACP in the shower but chatteris always gets a good outing. I have been listening to ACP a lot lately and although bits of it are very clever it still does not quite do it for me. So chatteris it is for the open bus trip round Trumptonshire.
14 June 2011
LaL
What a very entertaining competition this has been,suprised at the finalists,but of the two its got to be Chateris . Hope we get the chance to do the same again next season.maybe one of this years early fallers can have another opportunity to progress to the final.:)
14 June 2011
2 Chevrons
Since National Shite Day went down the pan, I’ve been following the mighty Chatteris.
Great work with this Chris by the way and a good job the LFC didn’t follow the same format as the Europa, otherwise we’d still be ‘Back in the DHSS’ …
14 June 2011
Steve G
Sting singing on the roof of the Barbican …. A Country Practice for me
14 June 2011
littlegrafter
Played both to a colleague on the way in to work yesterday, she immediately said Chatteris, She is of course wrong. Also same colleague once was witness to a remarkable jogproof shuffle moment. On full shuffle mode (approx 10,000 tracks) we were treated to Lord Hereford’s Knob followed immediately by Keeping 2 Chevrons apart…. You couldn’t make it up!
15 June 2011
Shirley Dimensions
I wanted to go to the pub and not for a coffee. I’m now being forced to make a decision between two tracks, neither of which are ‘Thy Damnation Slumbereth Not’. Chatteris then (on penalties).
15 June 2011
TWO FAT FEET
BREAKING NEWS
The Lux Familiar Cup committee is considering whether to disqualify ACP from the competition, following a protest from Chatteris that Duff Leg Bryn is in fact cup-tied.
15 June 2011
Bad Wool in the Luther Blisset Stand
Little in the Way of Sunshine has already been fined for fielding said ineligible player.
This is just an attempt to deflect press attention from your internal wranglings over cup final bonuses.
Small-town team not used to the limelight, small-town English “O” Level rhyming couplet mentality
And what about that bracelet your captain stole from the Columbia hotel eh ??
15 June 2011
Chris The Siteowner
We seem to have a full explanation of the Duff Leg Bryn controversy here. Excellent! But is anyone going to rise to the challenge of playing out the match on a line by line basis as was done so ably by one or two contributors in earlier rounds? I’m already smiling at the thought of Sting soaring as high as the roof of The Barbican to nod in a late equaliser.
15 June 2011
Mac
Wonder if the imminent construction of a Tesco will ruin Chatteris’s ambience.
Citizen web exclusive: Tesco to come to Chatteris
The Citizen can exclusively reveal that a Tesco foodstore is proposed to be built on the Fenland Way site in Chatteris following the grant of planning permission on the land last year.
Harrier Developments Limited have secured an agreement with Tesco to build an environmental store and will be submitting details of the design to Fenland District Council.
The development will bring a Tesco store, a petrol filing station, a new pedestrian link beneath the A141 Fenland Way and a contribution to FACT (Fenland Association for Community Transport), enabling the provision of a new bus which will provide a service to the store six days a week.
The construction of the new access serving the foodstore will also enable the relocation of Travis Perkins from their current premises on London Road to the land adjacent to the store, providing Travis Perkins with the operational needs for a new modern day Builders Merchant.
Thanks to Chris for running this. Great fun. Must do it again sometime.
15 June 2011
Dennis Bell – Torquay
Though I’d withdrawn from the competition early on having lost out on each tie I’m back as I sniff an easy kill. Both are beautifully crafted songs that show off the HMHB range – anger at the crap we put up with, through to poking fun at (in FWIC is) middle England et al. For me, when they do anger it’s better than any protest band/singer and so it’s ACP all the way.
Might be a different story if ACP was up against National Shite Day or Blood on the Quad.
Still, though the cup might produce an overall winner, from 160-plus songs I can’t think of even one that I don’t look forward to listening to-. How many other bands can I say that about? Answer: None.
For next season if we assumed that those that made it through qualifying will be playing in their own super league could we have a vote on those that didn’t make it? There are some absolute gems that didn’t get a chance being stuck in tough qualifying groups, among them two if the best toons to be on a motorway with in Asparagus next Left and Jarg Armani.
16 June 2011
Chippy Minton
Fresh from my private liaison with Mrs Honeyman I wanted to add that anywhere with three good butchers, two fine chandlers an indoor pool and a first class cake shop, is always going to get my vote,especially when I can nip into the chandlers for odds and ends.
16 June 2011
Third Rate Les
This final feels to me a bit like Brazil vs. Italy in 1994.
It follows a glitteringly exciting tournament, it’s going on a bit, and I’m not sure anyone other than die-hard fans of either team are all that bothered.
And to stretch the analogy a bit far, the fans of Chatteris have a tendency to gasp in admiration every time their team complete a simple pass. Swigging from a bottle of lager while talking of the beautiful game, perhaps.
Which would suggest that ACP has a strong but irritating pony-tailed player (Sting, perhaps) who is about to hoof the ball over the bar.
16 June 2011
Norbert D
“See you all next Friday 17th, I’m the old grey git going mental at the front”
That’ll narrow it down, at a HMHB gig.
16 June 2011
Elton W.
If like me you found David Peace’s revealing view from inside the Chatteris dressing room (see semi-final thread) to be a bleak and depressing experience, I thought I would bring you a contrasting view, an interview with that great philosopher of the beautiful game, Uruguayan writer Eduardo Galeano.
It’s more than 20 years since Eduardo Galeano began his great book on football with those famous words “I’ve finally learned to accept myself for who I am – a beggar for good football, expecting alms, but just being pelted with the same old figs.” I caught up with this venerable giant of South American literature on the eve of his first ever visit to the New Wembley for the 2011 Lux familiar Cup Final, and asked him if he expected more of the same.
“Yes indeedy,” he tells me, “Chatteris has brought through a ‘golden generation’ of quality entertainers, largely culled from the local area. In a way, this is their time, and yet they also belong to the past, to a backward-looking generation, still playing the game as if it was all about a rigid A+A, B+B formation like it was when the public schools of England first codified the people’s own folk-singing game.
“Things began to change for this game after the Great War and the visionaries who were aware of what was going on in European verse knew that their tactics had to change too, to become more fluid, more surreal, pursuing dreams and sub-conscious associations. Darker verse, like the human psyche itself. Simple rhymes were out. Ferenc Puskas of Honved humiliated England, with knobs on. He then moved on to dominate Europe with Real Madrid where he spawned a whole generation of fluid new UltraSur chants. Most of the English game, and its folksinging followers, failed to learn the lesson. 1966 and all that? Just a flash in the pan for the old school, like this Chatteris cup run of 2011.
“But some of you English are finally beginning to catch up. Watch Adrian/Sophie float between the rigid lines of four that comprise the Chatteris ranks. Is he an attacker or a midfielder ? Is he a man or a woman? It doesn’t really matter. If you go with him you’ll be warped every time, leaving a gap which Sting may refuse to exploit on ethical grounds. But Thatcher will have no such qualms – she’ll cut you to pieces. Your rigid prick barriers at both ends just won’t work – Adrian-stroke-Sophie will pierce them every time. Yes, indeedy, that’s footy.
“But this isn’t about the past, or about a team like Chatteris, on great form though they are in the present. It’s about what all this means for the game of the future. The way an outfit like A Country Practice keeps bringing through generation after generation of new entertainers, running rings around yet more TV cliches, yet more linguistic foibles, yet more Olympic-sized wastes of money, and still being impossible to classify. Go and see them live if you can. The way they are confident in possession of the language, caressing it. Never a misplaced first touch, keeping your attention as if it were a precious object, never the same twice but doing it year after year while the actual lines gradually change.
“My prediction? I think Chatteris will compete well early on, try to knock the opinionated weather forecasters on the bonce a bit. 1-1 at the half-way stage, But like the Fens themselves, the later stages will see Chatteris completely drained. That’s when A Country Practice’s energy-saving possession style will come into it’s own, and deprived of possession, that jaunty confidence will drain too. Chance after chance for A Country Practice will see them win going clear. I’d put my money on 3-1.
“Thirty years after Thatcher seized North-East Cambridgeshire from a surreal Freudian, thirty long years after those troubled times for Toxteth, the cup is going back to Merseyside where it belongs. You labelled them idle layabouts. But they’re not.”
17 June 2011
nobby
I have considered this for so long, its a toughie…………
shall i go for the angst of ACP? or the poetic words of Chatt??
pelted with figs??…….or drive-by shoutings??
gosh its tough this decision stuff……………
however, after long consideration i will go for ACP, the reason?? well, if you look at the video post above of Leeds gig thats me (bottom left in a white-looking top, but actually blue) and thats me mate Phatskills stood next to me (in the Fred Perry t-shirt), incidently, if you look at the ‘audience particapation’ Leeds gig on youtoob of Vitas thats me in the bottom left again (a more noticable blue t-shirt) trying to dance with me pint in me hand………… yip, its hard making decisions
17 June 2011
Peter PInguid
I have unfortunately only now come upon the Lux Familiar Cup and never had a chance to vote. It is at once both the most inspired and most astonishing thing I have ever seen and have felt real nervous anticipation reading through the results of each round. My outfit, We Built This VIllage, went out far too early but have pinned my hopes on Chatteris ever since so delighted to see them make the final (like an 83 Brighton or a 90 Crystal Palace). Now to click on the result… fingers crossed!
19 June 2011